Episode 5

Breaking Through Roadblocks to Change with Hypnotherapy - with Genevieve Joy

Today I happily welcome Genevieve Joy, quantum healer and certified master hypnotherapist, to talk about what hypnotherapy is, what it isn’t, and how it can be best put to use for healing and behavior change.

Genevieve was born with thyroid cancer that went undetected until it was the size of a softball at the age of 11. Her whole life she dealt with extreme fatigue and pain from interstitial cystitis that would never go away, along with an abusive home situation. She made a conscious choice to dissociate from her body and numb herself as much as she could and become the world’s best people pleaser. After 14 years in an abusive marriage, she finally had enough, filed for divorce, and looked up all the strangest, most woo-woo methods out there to heal her physical and emotional suffering. 

During a particularly intense pain flare up, she tried a technique from quantum healing and within an hour, all her pain was gone and it has never come back. What she had done was deleted the neurology that created that pain and the emotional storm around it. Since then she has refined her technique so she can teach it to her clients so they can make changes at the unconscious level.

This episode is full of wisdom about how quantum healing works, who it works best for, and how it’s done. You have to be willing to let go of your old identity and brave enough to do the work without blaming anyone. The degree to which you prioritize your own well-being is the degree to which you will be well.

Learn more about Genevieve Joy:

Website: https://www.iamgenevievejoy.com/

Social IG and Facebook: @iamgenevievejoy

 

Interested in working with Jeannie?

Schedule a 30-minute Coffee Talk here.

Connect with me on Instagram @joliverwellness! DM me the words “Nutrition Edit” and I’ll add you to my close friends list, where I share exclusive content. You’ll be the first to know about upcoming programs and early access to my waitlist.

Music credit: Funk’d Up by Reaktor Productions

A Podcast Launch Bestie production

Transcript
Jeannie Oliver:

Hey there and welcome back to the Nutrition Edit podcast.

Jeannie Oliver:

I'm your host, Jeanie Oliver, functional nutrition and wellness coach, and

Jeannie Oliver:

today my guest is Genevieve Joy.

Jeannie Oliver:

Genevieve is a quantum healer and certified master hypnotherapist, and she

Jeannie Oliver:

has also been fully initiated into the ancient Polynesian healing art of Huna.

Jeannie Oliver:

She now uses these tools to guide other women in healing the source

Jeannie Oliver:

of their most problematic patterns, enabling them to create lives that feel

Jeannie Oliver:

vibrant, joyful, and deeply fulfill.

Jeannie Oliver:

I've always been very curious about hypnotherapy and today we dive

Jeannie Oliver:

into what it is, what it isn't, and how we can best put it to use

Jeannie Oliver:

for healing and behavior change.

Jeannie Oliver:

I learned a ton from Genevieve today and I had so much fun talking with her, so

Jeannie Oliver:

I think you're gonna love this episode.

Jeannie Oliver:

So without further review, let's jump in.

Genevieve Joy:

Hey, Genevieve, welcome.

Jeannie Oliver:

I'm so glad to have you here today.

Jeannie Oliver:

Thanks for joining.

Genevieve Joy:

Hey Jeanie, thanks so much for having me.

Genevieve Joy:

I'm so glad to be here.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah, welcome.

Jeannie Oliver:

I'm so excited to talk to you about this today because it's something

Jeannie Oliver:

I've been curious about for a really long time, and I know that there are

Jeannie Oliver:

a lot of myths around hypnotherapy and, you know, just misconceptions.

Jeannie Oliver:

Those of us, like myself who may be sort of, you know, Leaning towards control

Jeannie Oliver:

freak status are a little freaked out by the idea of being hypnotized.

Jeannie Oliver:

So so many questions for you today.

Jeannie Oliver:

I'm really excited about it, but let's just dive in.

Jeannie Oliver:

I wanna hear a little more about your background, tell us

Jeannie Oliver:

your story, it's so powerful.

Jeannie Oliver:

And then share a little bit about how you got into doing this.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

My story is kind of wild and it really starts back in 2017 when I

Genevieve Joy:

was at the lowest point in my life, physically, emotionally, and mentally.

Genevieve Joy:

I was born with thyroid cancer that went undetected until it became the size of

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a softball when I was 11, and it had already metastasized and spread 200

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smaller tumors all the way from the base of my brain to the top of my heart, and,

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and I did have the cancer removed and.

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Taking thyroid replacement hormone.

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But my entire life I had to deal with an extreme level of

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fatigue that did not go away.

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Even after the surgery.

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And when I was two years old, I was diagnosed with an intense chronic

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pain condition called interstitial cystitis, which if you're not

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familiar, is the pain of a bladder infection without any actual infection.

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So there's no obvious way to make it go away and.

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So doctors told me that they didn't know how to fix it, but they offered

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me , some pretty intense narcotic drugs to try and manage that pain,

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but it, it just never went away.

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So I spent every day of my life in just extreme levels

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of fatigue and physical pain.

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And I also grew up in an extremely abusive family.

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My parents were both raging narcissists and they just terrorized

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me emotionally and psychologically, and by the time I made it to college,

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I just felt like a completely worthless human being, and I was so.

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Psychologically traumatized that I, I honestly had a hard time

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telling the difference sometimes between my dreams and reality.

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But you would never have known that any of this was going on to, to look at me

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not, and not even my closest friends knew because I had straight aides.

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I was a student athlete in college.

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I mean, I had my stuff together, but the only reason I was able to do that was.

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When I was 13, I, I made a very conscious choice to completely

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dissociate myself from my body so that I could get on with my life.

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I mean, I, I remember the day I was sitting in my room and I was in so

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much pain, and I was so tired, and I just wanted to sleep all day long,

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and I was so tired of being afraid of my parents, and I remember thinking,

Genevieve Joy:

I cannot go on like this anymore.

Genevieve Joy:

I to be honest, I, I was like, I don't think I can kill myself,

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but I can't keep living like this.

Genevieve Joy:

So I just decided to become the world's greatest people pleaser, and I would just

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agree to shape shift into whoever I needed to be to get my parents to leave me alone.

Genevieve Joy:

And I just decided to become as numb as I had to be to my body so

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that I could do the things I wanted to do to have some semblance of.

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I, I wanted to play sports and I wanted to do creative writing,

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and I wanted to play music.

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So every day from that day on, I woke up and I asked myself, okay,

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what would I do today if I was not in pain or exhausted or super depressed?

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And then I just would pretend that I was not any of those things, that

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I'd go do whatever I wanted to do.

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I was still miserable, but at least I was doing stuff right.

Genevieve Joy:

Well, fast forward to 2000 s.

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I was in a much more intense moment of that moment when I was 13, when I

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realized I can't live like this anymore.

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That interstitial cystitis pain had become so intense that it would cause me

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to vomit or pass out on a regular basis.

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And I'm over six feet tall and I only weigh 112 pounds.

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I look like a walking skeleton, and I'd spent the last 14 years

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in an abusive marriage and my ability to pretend like I was okay

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physically ventrally or emotionally.

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Gone.

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Completely gone.

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I just felt like there's, there's absolutely no way that this

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is ever going to get better.

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I felt like my life is basically the same since it wasn't, I was a little

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kid and, and if I can't figure out a way to fix this then it's just, it

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must never going to, you know, change.

Genevieve Joy:

But again, I felt like.

Genevieve Joy:

I can't kill myself.

Genevieve Joy:

I can't end this cuz I've got kids.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

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And if I'm not here, they're gonna be stuck with their abusive dad if I'm gone.

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And then one day my ex-husband gave me the greatest gift that

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I've ever received to this day.

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And I mean that seriously.

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He's a big drinker, and during the day, you know, he'd go to work and

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like live it up with his friends.

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Then he'd come home and take all of his emotions out on me.

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And I would respond every time by saying like the right

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things, quote unquote, right?

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I'd say what you're doing is totally unacceptable and it's true, right?

Genevieve Joy:

And you need to knock it off now.

Genevieve Joy:

Look how you're hurting me.

Genevieve Joy:

Look how you're hurt.

Genevieve Joy:

And every time he'd respond in exactly the same way, I don't have a problem.

Genevieve Joy:

You're the only one with the problem here.

Genevieve Joy:

And he was obviously trying to gaslight me.

Genevieve Joy:

Right?

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

And for a long time it worked.

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Until one day everything happened.

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Like it always happens, right?

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The pattern repeated.

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But when he said those words that day, for some reason I

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just, I heard them differently.

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And I allowed myself to stop for a second and just get a little bit curious, and I

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asked myself, all right, hold on a minute.

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what's a problem really?

Genevieve Joy:

Well, maybe a problem that is something that causes somebody to feel pain.

Genevieve Joy:

Okay.

Genevieve Joy:

That that seems right.

Genevieve Joy:

All right, well, who in this situation is feeling pain?

Genevieve Joy:

Oh yeah, it's not him.

Genevieve Joy:

That's me . And that means I am the one with the problem.

Genevieve Joy:

Well, if this problem belongs to me, then I am the one with the authority to fix it.

Genevieve Joy:

And that is when everything changed.

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And I became totally single minded in that moment.

Genevieve Joy:

I stopped trying to save my ex from himself and I stopped trying

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to save my kids from their dad.

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And I decided to put everything I had into saving myself.

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Cuz I realized that's the only thing I had the power to.

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And I just held on to the belief that by doing everything I possibly could to

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end this obvious generational pattern of abuse, both self abuse and abuse

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from other people, then I would show my kids how to save themselves too.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah, and I'll tell you, that is exactly what happened.

Genevieve Joy:

The very next day I filed for divorce, I started researching the weirdest most out

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there healing methods to try to heal my physical, mental, and emotional suffering.

Genevieve Joy:

I'd been in traditional therapy my whole life and it didn't change

Genevieve Joy:

anything for me mentally or emotionally.

Genevieve Joy:

I'd been to doctors at the top research hospitals all over the country.

Genevieve Joy:

They couldn't do a thing for my physical pain, you know?

Genevieve Joy:

And then I got into, you know, a little more of the like mainstream woowoo, right?

Genevieve Joy:

I tried yoga, meditation, journaling, and I definitely had more hope, but nothing in

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my everyday reality was changing at all.

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So I just decided to get as far away from the mainstream as I could.

Genevieve Joy:

Yep.

Genevieve Joy:

Get me all the weird stuff.

Genevieve Joy:

Let me try it.

Genevieve Joy:

And I found hypnotherapy and quantum healing and I learned about one tiny

Genevieve Joy:

little piece of the full quantum healing process that I now teach my students.

Genevieve Joy:

And one day when I had a really intense.

Genevieve Joy:

Pain flare up of that interstitial cystitis.

Genevieve Joy:

I was in my car, I was sobbing, I was close to passing out.

Genevieve Joy:

I stopped driving, obviously, and I thought, you know what?

Genevieve Joy:

I don't have anything to lose, so why don't I just give this weird thing a shot?

Genevieve Joy:

So, Without really knowing what I was doing.

Genevieve Joy:

I tried it, and I'll tell you what, within 30 minutes, my physical pain

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went from being a 10, outta 10 to a three, and that had never happened

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before, even with hardcore narcotics.

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And 20 minutes later, by the time I got home, my pain was at a zero.

Genevieve Joy:

And since that moment, six years ago it's never come back.

Genevieve Joy:

Not even a teeny tiny bit, even though the most stressful times of my life have.

Genevieve Joy:

After that moment.

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The piece of that process is something that I call timelining.

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The way I do it now has evolved immensely since that little

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process that I use in that moment.

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The idea is to go back to the original root cause of the pattern,

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which is something you will probably not consciously remember.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah, but in that moment, because my, my body was so lit up all of

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my neurological pathways associated with that pain, which is the same

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neurological pathways that are associated with the emotional constellation

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that I have around that pain, right?

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It's all the same thing.

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They were more as lit up as they could possibly be, and that means all I really

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needed was anything, anything can help me access the unconscious route of that.

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So it's gonna go like, Hmm.

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Because it was so on fire, right?

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And so that's what I did.

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I, I went back in time and I recalled a highly, highly charged memory associated

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with the emotions of that pain.

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And I did some work to give and receive healing information around that.

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And it was just gone.

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It was just gone.

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I don't recommend doing it that way because most people's

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neurology is not going to be lit up to the degree that mine was.

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That's why that was so effective because that process wasn't

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as effective as it could be.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

But yeah, that's why it worked.

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And I, I believe it was so effective.

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and the changes that it created were so permanent because I actually deleted

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the neurology that was creating my physical pain and the emotional pain

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that went with it, that neurology is gone, which is why it cannot come back.

Genevieve Joy:

So yeah, after that day, I remember I got home, I, and I just sat in my

Genevieve Joy:

car holding onto the steering wheel.

Genevieve Joy:

Really letting the realization sink in of what I just did.

Genevieve Joy:

I just did something that doctors all over this country

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told me would never be possible.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

I made a miracle, a real life miracle, and in that moment I,

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I was a totally different woman.

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and I, I re, like, I can, I can do magic here.

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I have to tell everybody else if I can do magic, if I can change the thing that was

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torturing me, then what else can I do?

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And I wanna help other women learn how to stop their own suffering.

Genevieve Joy:

Right?

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So I got my certification as a master hypnotherapist and I started working

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with women who wanted to heal the source of their problematic patterns.

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And I just kept learning and refining and learning, refining,

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and I continued to take my study of unconscious healing method.

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even further even to the more kind of esoteric right until I went through

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a very powerful spiritual initiation process into ancient Hawaiian Huna,

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which I believe is like the pinnacle of unconscious healing methods.

Genevieve Joy:

And, and that's what I use today.

Genevieve Joy:

Wow.

Genevieve Joy:

That's intense

Genevieve Joy:

. Jeannie Oliver: Yeah, it's amazing.

Genevieve Joy:

And.

Genevieve Joy:

I mean, wow.

Genevieve Joy:

Like, I don't even know what to say to that.

Genevieve Joy:

I think that so many of us, I mean obviously it's, it's

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relative for everyone, right?

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It's I think sometimes we can get into this like contest, so to

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speak, in our own heads of like, well, I don't have it that bad.

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It could be so much worse.

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I could have gone through what generally did or what someone else did,

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and it could just be so much worse.

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And so we push things off and push things off and we don't address

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them because we're minimizing them.

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And I think that in itself is sort of a survival mechanism.

Genevieve Joy:

Like it's not that bad.

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You can just keep going.

Genevieve Joy:

And it's a way of dissociating as well.

Genevieve Joy:

Yep, yep.

Genevieve Joy:

So yeah, I mean, thanks for sharing that because that's, An incredible

Genevieve Joy:

shift in what you'd experienced your entire life up to that point.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

And so you said that started when you were two.

Genevieve Joy:

How old were you and if you don't mind me asking, when this shift happened?

Genevieve Joy:

Let's see, so I was 37 8.

Genevieve Joy:

Seven, eight, somewhere in there.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Late thirties . Isn't that so interesting?

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

I, I didn't get into doing my own work.

Jeannie Oliver:

Until my late thirties either.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

, it's a very interesting time in our lives.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

. Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

awakening and a realization that

Genevieve Joy:

midlife, so.

Genevieve Joy:

Yep.

Genevieve Joy:

It's a beautiful time.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

So

Jeannie Oliver:

tell me, why don't you tell us what hypnotherapy actually

Jeannie Oliver:

is and how it works, because I think that we all sort of have this idea

Jeannie Oliver:

of, you know, the random guy on the stage and criticizes someone and makes

Genevieve Joy:

them quack, like a duck, like a dog, whatever.

Genevieve Joy:

So tell us what it actually.

Genevieve Joy:

Okay.

Genevieve Joy:

So first of all, that's a thing and you know, okay, , that's not this,

Genevieve Joy:

I don't, I mean, Quacken leg aduc is fine, but like, how does that help

Genevieve Joy:

you change your life if Quacken leg a duck help you to change your life?

Genevieve Joy:

I'd be all on board.

Genevieve Joy:

But I, I, I haven't, fine, I haven't found why for that to do that.

Genevieve Joy:

So that's why I don't do it.

Genevieve Joy:

So hypnosis is a fairly general term that refers to any process

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that allows you to access.

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Unconscious mind.

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That's the aspect of you that runs your bodily functions, your emotions, your

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memories, your desires, your thoughts, your obsessions and compulsions.

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Anything that you don't consciously choose is run by your unconscious mind.

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And I think the thing that's really important to notice here is that your

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unconscious mind is the link between your body, your emotions, your.

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and the desire you have to make or avoid making certain choices.

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There's an unconscious motivation right behind your choices, and unless you're

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using a healing process that has the power to access that unconscious source that's

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driving your emotions, your thoughts, and your choices, then the chance of

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you being able to make a big change that lasts over the long term isn't great

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because you can't just consciously choose to override your unconscious program.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

You, you can't just like, you can't consciously choose to stop your own heart.

Genevieve Joy:

Right now it's the same thing.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Okay.

Genevieve Joy:

Now, when you do use an unconscious healing process, you are able to do

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one simple thing that creates a massive change in your experience of life.

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And that happens because when you make a change at the unconscious level,

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you're changing the very mechanism by which your entire reality and

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your quality of life is created.

Genevieve Joy:

That means you will feel like a totally different.

Genevieve Joy:

. Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

That's so powerful.

Jeannie Oliver:

I, you know, I tend to use the term like, oh, your, your brain is driving

Jeannie Oliver:

the bus or your mind is driving the bus.

Jeannie Oliver:

Which that's true to some degree, but there is so much that is

Jeannie Oliver:

subconscious for us mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

, that we can't understand with our logical minds.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

right.

Jeannie Oliver:

As to well, why, even though I know something doesn't serve me well,

Jeannie Oliver:

I know that, Drinking too much alcohol or eating tons of sugar,

Jeannie Oliver:

whatever it might be, you know?

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

not moving my body.

Jeannie Oliver:

, I know these things don't work for me.

Jeannie Oliver:

They don't serve me well.

Jeannie Oliver:

I know consciously, so many of the people that I work with, they know a lot

Jeannie Oliver:

It's not lack of knowledge that they are coming in with.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

It's this deeper emotional driver that exists that, it could be

Jeannie Oliver:

easier or harder to uncover.

Jeannie Oliver:

And so that's why I think this is so exciting because

Jeannie Oliver:

it taps into those things and.

Jeannie Oliver:

what I think is coming now into our social consciousness.

Jeannie Oliver:

Better understanding of just how our nervous systems work.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

And look, even if you've been in a very negative or abusive

Jeannie Oliver:

situation, you're used to that.

Jeannie Oliver:

So the nervous system knows it's kind of the devil, you know?

Jeannie Oliver:

Right, exactly.

Jeannie Oliver:

It's familiarity there.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

And it's gonna keep trying to maintain that sort of state,

Jeannie Oliver:

because that's familiar.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

We know how to cope with that.

Jeannie Oliver:

We know how to navigate that.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

But even if we're making positive changes, like.

Jeannie Oliver:

That tells the nervous system.

Jeannie Oliver:

Cause the nervous system doesn't have like a little, you know,

Jeannie Oliver:

thinking reasoning brain.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

, it's just mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

Cellular, you know, on a cellular primal level.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

how it's gonna react to keep us safe.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Keep us alive.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

And so, you know, I see this so many times.

Jeannie Oliver:

I think a really good example is we all have, and I think I've used this

Jeannie Oliver:

in a previous podcast, like we've all got the one friend who like dates

Jeannie Oliver:

essentially the same person over and over.

Jeannie Oliver:

And it's always.

Jeannie Oliver:

A terrible situation.

Jeannie Oliver:

It's always a bad choice.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

But they're attracted to that type of person because it's something that's

Jeannie Oliver:

familiar, that feels safe in that.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

, even if it's absolutely the opposite.

Jeannie Oliver:

So, yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah, so anyway, I got off track a little bit on there, on that subject.

Jeannie Oliver:

But I just think it's really helpful and empowering to understand that our

Jeannie Oliver:

nervous systems wanna keep us someplace.

Jeannie Oliver:

And so it's natural to have this sort of innate built in resistance to change.

Jeannie Oliver:

And we can release the shame

Genevieve Joy:

around that.

Genevieve Joy:

Absolutely.

Genevieve Joy:

And like, yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

And like, let's just, let me let everybody off the hook here, . But you

Genevieve Joy:

know, when we have those moments when we like find ourselves at the end of a

Genevieve Joy:

relationship with the same kind of D bag that we've been dating forever, right?

Genevieve Joy:

It was one of my favorite terms.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah, totally.

Genevieve Joy:

You know what I mean?

Genevieve Joy:

It's not like you saw that guy and you.

Genevieve Joy:

Douche canoe over here.

Genevieve Joy:

Let me sign up for this one.

Genevieve Joy:

. That's my dude.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

That obviously didn't happen.

Genevieve Joy:

No.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

You know, same thing with finding yourself, you know, in front of the

Genevieve Joy:

freezer at midnight, just, you know, yes.

Genevieve Joy:

Hoovering a pint of ice cream.

Genevieve Joy:

It's not like you said, this is gonna be a great look for me.

Genevieve Joy:

I'm gonna Yes to that.

Genevieve Joy:

Yes to that.

Genevieve Joy:

That's not what happened.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

There is an emotional resource.

Genevieve Joy:

There is something that you felt like you were lacking and that

Genevieve Joy:

douche canoe or that pin of ice cream or what the new purge that.

Genevieve Joy:

Spent way too much money on, right?

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

That was giving you access to an emotional resource that you felt like you didn't

Genevieve Joy:

have enough of, and that there was no other way for you to get in the moment.

Genevieve Joy:

That's why you did that.

Genevieve Joy:

So quit beating yourself up over that.

Genevieve Joy:

You need that emotional resource.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah, you need that right now.

Genevieve Joy:

What we can do with hypnotherapy is neutralize your attachment to having.

Genevieve Joy:

So that you can actually receive it and the blocks that are keeping you from

Genevieve Joy:

having it right, so that it's yours now.

Genevieve Joy:

And now we don't need to go looking for it in inappropriate ways like

Genevieve Joy:

douche canoes and pine of ice cream and overpriced handbags.

Genevieve Joy:

Right now you can ask yourself, wait a minute, what about this guy?

Genevieve Joy:

is attracting me to him.

Genevieve Joy:

Or obviously you won't be attracted to those kinds of guys anymore.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

But when you're thinking about ice cream, when you're thinking about purses, it's a

Genevieve Joy:

totally different kind of feeling for you.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

That's how you're able to make conscious choices, right?

Genevieve Joy:

We need to get that unconscious programming that's keeping you stuck in

Genevieve Joy:

that pattern handled so that you can't actually consciously create your life.

Genevieve Joy:

You won't be able to consciously create your life until you do that.

Genevieve Joy:

So no need for blame.

Genevieve Joy:

That doesn't need to be a part of it at all, right?

Genevieve Joy:

This is about a search for resources, and those resources are things that you need.

Genevieve Joy:

You're just going about them in inappropriate ways.

Genevieve Joy:

Let's take care of that, and then it's gonna be no big deal.

Genevieve Joy:

, right?

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

So give me a little play by play.

Jeannie Oliver:

I come into your office or we're having a session online, however you work.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

And, okay, Janie, it's time.

Jeannie Oliver:

Like we're gonna do some hypnotherapy work.

Genevieve Joy:

What does that look like?

Genevieve Joy:

Okay.

Genevieve Joy:

Well, first of all, I wanna tell you, explain to folks what trance is.

Genevieve Joy:

Trance is just the name we call of, like that state you go into when you are.

Genevieve Joy:

In hypnosis.

Genevieve Joy:

Notice I did not say being hypnotized.

Genevieve Joy:

Okay?

Genevieve Joy:

All hypnosis is self hypnosis.

Genevieve Joy:

Okay?

Genevieve Joy:

I can say things to you, I'm just gonna give you directions, right?

Genevieve Joy:

Go inside, see this happening.

Genevieve Joy:

See this happening.

Genevieve Joy:

You can do it or not do it.

Genevieve Joy:

It's totally up to you, right?

Genevieve Joy:

So what have I told you?

Genevieve Joy:

That you are in a trance right this moment.

Genevieve Joy:

You and I are both in a trance together.

Genevieve Joy:

Everybody listening to this is in a trance right now.

Genevieve Joy:

It's just that, again, the name of the state that you're

Genevieve Joy:

in when you're hypnotized.

Genevieve Joy:

We're in a very, very light trance right now, but you are in one.

Genevieve Joy:

Every time you read, watch tv, listen to a podcast, scroll through

Genevieve Joy:

social media, drive in your.

Genevieve Joy:

, you are in a trance.

Genevieve Joy:

Okay?

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Every moment that you move through life without 100% conscious

Genevieve Joy:

awareness, you're in a trance.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

. But in order to do that every single moment of every day,

Genevieve Joy:

you'd have to consciously ask yourself, what do I want now?

Genevieve Joy:

What do I want now?

Genevieve Joy:

What do I want now?

Genevieve Joy:

But we don't do that.

Genevieve Joy:

And that's, that's not a bad thing, right?

Genevieve Joy:

Because you literally drive yourself insane.

Genevieve Joy:

If you did that , right?

Genevieve Joy:

You can't live like that.

Genevieve Joy:

So we need our unconscious minds because they make our lives easier and they

Genevieve Joy:

give us peace and the space to rest.

Genevieve Joy:

Right?

Genevieve Joy:

So with hypnotherapy, all we're doing is recognizing, hey, you're

Genevieve Joy:

already in a trance most of the time.

Genevieve Joy:

Why don't we do it on purpose with the intention of healing our most problematic

Genevieve Joy:

patterns so we can consciously create a life that feels vibrant, joyful, and

Genevieve Joy:

deeply fulfilling instead of numbing ourselves and living life on autopilot.

Genevieve Joy:

Right, right.

Genevieve Joy:

So we're just going into that in a deeper

Jeannie Oliver:

level,

Genevieve Joy:

essentially.

Genevieve Joy:

and we're getting information first.

Genevieve Joy:

The first step is to get information, and I'm gonna tell you now, it doesn't

Genevieve Joy:

have anything to do with who did what to you and what their damage was.

Genevieve Joy:

That interesting is not helpful.

Genevieve Joy:

What I wanna know is what's that resource, right?

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

, what are you hoping to have happen or stop happening when you date Mr.

Genevieve Joy:

Douche canoe?

Genevieve Joy:

. , right?

Genevieve Joy:

How are you expecting to feel?

Genevieve Joy:

What's gonna stop happening for you when you.

Genevieve Joy:

Prince Charming when you find Mr.

Genevieve Joy:

Wright or Mrs.

Genevieve Joy:

Wright or whoever it is, right?

Genevieve Joy:

And we get all of these resources that have been keeping this

Genevieve Joy:

problematic pattern attached to you.

Genevieve Joy:

Let me go get all that stuff.

Genevieve Joy:

Notice I don't need details about, mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

, what made you choose the, I don't need any about that stuff.

Genevieve Joy:

Okay.

Genevieve Joy:

I don't need any of that information.

Genevieve Joy:

In fact, when we get into the details of your problem, all it's doing

Genevieve Joy:

is solidifying the neurology that you've created around the problem.

Genevieve Joy:

So interesting.

Genevieve Joy:

I never recommend, please do not get into conversations with your

Genevieve Joy:

friends about all of these things.

Genevieve Joy:

You're just making it worse.

Genevieve Joy:

Okay?

Genevieve Joy:

It's one thing to talk about feelings.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Right now I'm feeling X, Y, Z, and I'm feeling this other way.

Genevieve Joy:

As soon as you start using the word, because you are traveling a very d.

Genevieve Joy:

Okay.

Genevieve Joy:

So just be aware of that.

Genevieve Joy:

What I recommend we do instead is something I called an emotional barf.

Genevieve Joy:

Some people don't like it because they don't get to use because but

Genevieve Joy:

it actually, it, it's incredibly effective and all you have to do is

Genevieve Joy:

just sit down when you're in a funky state and you just list your feelings.

Genevieve Joy:

Right now I am feeling blank.

Genevieve Joy:

No, because I'm feeling blank.

Genevieve Joy:

I'm feeling blank.

Genevieve Joy:

I'm feeling blank.

Genevieve Joy:

I'm feeling blank.

Genevieve Joy:

And you are probably gonna notice that you get a mix of positively charged

Genevieve Joy:

words and negatively charged words.

Genevieve Joy:

It doesn't matter.

Genevieve Joy:

You feel like you have too much of the negative stuff and

Genevieve Joy:

not enough of the positive.

Genevieve Joy:

And this is a way to neutralize both of them so you can have less

Genevieve Joy:

of the stuff you don't want and more of the stuff that you do want.

Genevieve Joy:

And you may also notice that you get a lot of repeat.

Genevieve Joy:

Doesn't matter.

Genevieve Joy:

That word just has a high charge for you and you just keep going until you

Genevieve Joy:

reach a place where there's nothing left.

Genevieve Joy:

I know that sounds a little bit vague, but I call it an emotional bar for a reason.

Genevieve Joy:

Cuz just like when you're barfing, when you have the flu, you know when

Genevieve Joy:

you're done , it's the same thing.

Genevieve Joy:

. Okay.

Genevieve Joy:

You just have to trust me on that one.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah, well that's

Jeannie Oliver:

cause that's so interesting.

Jeannie Oliver:

Cause that's exactly the opposite of, I think what traditional therapy does.

Jeannie Oliver:

Like you're rehashing and you're rehashing and you're unpacking this and that, and.

Jeannie Oliver:

. God, it's exhausting.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

And it doesn't work.

Jeannie Oliver:

Like, oh, we're actually just solidifying.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

Garbage.

Genevieve Joy:

Yep.

Genevieve Joy:

Yep.

Genevieve Joy:

It's helpful for people who, you know, lived in situations where I lived,

Genevieve Joy:

where it's like you were constantly being gaslit into believing that, like

Genevieve Joy:

what you saw you didn't see and what you're feeling you're not feeling.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

So that can be helpful.

Genevieve Joy:

Like for people who were like, wait, a who, who am I?

Genevieve Joy:

And what is happening?

Genevieve Joy:

Right?

Genevieve Joy:

And you go to therapy and you're like, wait a minute, did, is that a thing?

Genevieve Joy:

And they're like, yeah, that's a thing.

Genevieve Joy:

And then you go like, okay, I'm, I'm a whole human being right now.

Genevieve Joy:

I can trust my emotions to guide me.

Genevieve Joy:

Like if you were in that kind of a crappy place, yeah, you

Genevieve Joy:

might need something like that.

Genevieve Joy:

After that, if your goal for therapy is feeling validated and like returning to

Genevieve Joy:

center, I'm a hundred percent for that.

Genevieve Joy:

If your goal from therapy is trying to end your problematic patterns, yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Uh, I suggest we, we push pause and maybe ask ourselves, is that

Genevieve Joy:

really what's going on here?

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Very cool.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah, that's really encouraging because I, I, I mean, I, for years did therapy.

Jeannie Oliver:

decades even.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Traditional talk therapy.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

And I felt a little better.

Jeannie Oliver:

Like it was nice to get things off my chest and have someone

Jeannie Oliver:

who truly listened and cared.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

and you know, you walk away feeling a little bit lighter.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

Did it change anything?

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah, not really.

Jeannie Oliver:

No, it wasn't.

Jeannie Oliver:

And you know, I think this is sort of tied into the work you

Jeannie Oliver:

do, but it wasn't until I started working with a therapist who uses.

Jeannie Oliver:

more of these somatic modalities, like emtr and that type of thing.

Jeannie Oliver:

So in tapping that, I actually saw a shift.

Jeannie Oliver:

It's not like, and tell me if, if hypnosis is similar in this.

Jeannie Oliver:

It wasn't like I forgot things.

Jeannie Oliver:

It wasn't like suddenly this was an erase memory from my mind or my life.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

It was just that those experiences or events didn't carry that emotional charge

Jeannie Oliver:

so much anymore and they no longer had the power of my life that they used to.

Genevieve Joy:

Yes.

Genevieve Joy:

So there is a depth.

Genevieve Joy:

So what you're talking about with E M D R tapping, things like that, those are

Genevieve Joy:

processes that do access the unconscious.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

We can get into the technicality of that if you want to, but I think for general

Genevieve Joy:

purposes, that's why those are affected because they do work right now, there

Genevieve Joy:

is a level of depth with those, they can only go so deep because you're using

Genevieve Joy:

your conscious mind so much with those.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

It's true.

Genevieve Joy:

And sometimes I struggle with that.

Genevieve Joy:

Yep.

Genevieve Joy:

Cause I can't get out of that.

Genevieve Joy:

Exactly.

Genevieve Joy:

Exactly.

Genevieve Joy:

There Well, there is, you, everybody has something called a critical factor.

Genevieve Joy:

So if you think about your unconscious and conscious minds,

Genevieve Joy:

like a Venn diagram, that little place where they need in the middle.

Genevieve Joy:

Okay.

Genevieve Joy:

Is, is both a very helpful because it's a window for us to consciously use our

Genevieve Joy:

unconscious, which is what we need.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

And there's something that lives in there called a critical factor.

Genevieve Joy:

It's like a gateway.

Genevieve Joy:

That your unconscious mind uses to try to keep you in that safe zone

Genevieve Joy:

that you've already adapted to, right?

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

So the more you stay there in that middle place, if you've got a real

Genevieve Joy:

long-term problematic pattern, the trickier it is when you're using

Genevieve Joy:

very conscious processes like that.

Genevieve Joy:

Okay.

Genevieve Joy:

That makes sense.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

So when we do higher level unconscious healing, We're able to make a much

Genevieve Joy:

deeper transformation very quickly.

Genevieve Joy:

And I will tell you there is actually a way to erase memories.

Genevieve Joy:

I actually worked with a woman who unfortunately witnessed the

Genevieve Joy:

suicide of her son in her home.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

And I'm sure you can imagine all the problems that she had with that.

Genevieve Joy:

She drove home from work, walked in her front door.

Genevieve Joy:

Saw what she saw.

Genevieve Joy:

So she was having trouble, like even getting in her

Genevieve Joy:

car to drive home from work.

Genevieve Joy:

And she's a unique person, which is why this works so fast.

Genevieve Joy:

I don't think this might have worked so fast for everybody else in one session.

Genevieve Joy:

It's gone.

Genevieve Joy:

It was gone.

Genevieve Joy:

And I was like, you're gonna have to convince me.

Genevieve Joy:

I don't actually believe you.

Genevieve Joy:

This has never happened that fast for anybody else.

Genevieve Joy:

But I kept checking in with her and she's like, no, I'm fine.

Genevieve Joy:

I'm like, okay, tell me.

Genevieve Joy:

The one thing that you remember most about your son and when we

Genevieve Joy:

started working together, she was like, well, what do you think it is?

Genevieve Joy:

It's that last memory.

Genevieve Joy:

Right?

Genevieve Joy:

Which is where most people get stuck.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

And no, she was telling me all about the times when like, you know, he did the

Genevieve Joy:

school play when he was in fifth grade.

Genevieve Joy:

And those are, sweet memories, but they're much harder to access when

Genevieve Joy:

you have this intense, chronic thing.

Genevieve Joy:

No, it was, it was gone.

Genevieve Joy:

So we really can do things like.

Genevieve Joy:

What, what I find that most people don't need that though.

Genevieve Joy:

What they need is to see whatever that problematic pattern was or that

Genevieve Joy:

one really intense memory is from a much more empowered perspective.

Genevieve Joy:

You are not who, even if it happened yesterday, you are

Genevieve Joy:

not who you were yesterday.

Genevieve Joy:

You have gained more wisdom since then and what needs to happen is that

Genevieve Joy:

the you who was living then needs to receive the wisdom of grown ass.

Genevieve Joy:

You.

Genevieve Joy:

So that you can see that situation from a higher perspective.

Genevieve Joy:

Understand that whatever was happening there was just a search for resources.

Genevieve Joy:

Even if somebody did something horrible to you that on in no planet will

Genevieve Joy:

ever be acceptable, they were doing it because they were on a search

Genevieve Joy:

for resources and they didn't know how else to get those resources.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

And however you responded or you perceived that situation, it's the same thing.

Genevieve Joy:

It was a search for resources.

Genevieve Joy:

Well, you have those, now you have them.

Genevieve Joy:

So what's given to you?

Genevieve Joy:

. Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

. And we're gonna see it in a different way.

Genevieve Joy:

And yeah, there are other things that we do to make cuz I'm a person who is

Genevieve Joy:

very, very thorough and methodical.

Genevieve Joy:

I don't wanna just go in and like, let's clean this thing up 57 times.

Genevieve Joy:

I want it gone now.

Genevieve Joy:

And so we go in and do other things as well.

Genevieve Joy:

Go grab all the parts of you that are in conflict with this.

Genevieve Joy:

The parts of you that are in conflict with wanting to be past this for good.

Genevieve Joy:

Go round all those up cutting cords between the current version

Genevieve Joy:

of you and the old version of you.

Genevieve Joy:

There's a way that I do that that is extremely unconscious so that we can

Genevieve Joy:

really put this thing to bed for good.

Genevieve Joy:

And then the last piece that I think a lot of people either don't realize

Genevieve Joy:

exists or don't know what to do with, is that once you've done a healing,

Genevieve Joy:

you're actually in a void space.

Genevieve Joy:

You know who you're not anymore, but maybe you're not quite sure

Genevieve Joy:

about who you're becoming, that's a very dangerous space to stay in.

Genevieve Joy:

It's one thing to be in it for a second.

Genevieve Joy:

But once you do that, you know your unconscious mind wants safety.

Genevieve Joy:

And one of the main ways that it's probably gonna go about looking to

Genevieve Joy:

get safety is by repeating old habits.

Genevieve Joy:

The same kinds of choices and behaviors and things like that

Genevieve Joy:

that got you into that problematic situation in the first place.

Genevieve Joy:

We gotta get you outta there as fast as possible.

Genevieve Joy:

So that's why I build that into the quantum healing process

Genevieve Joy:

so you don't leave it written.

Genevieve Joy:

We're not done until you have done, it's a very simple thing.

Genevieve Joy:

We we're just infusing.

Genevieve Joy:

The events with this very specific energy.

Genevieve Joy:

And then once the healing process is technically done, like that internal work,

Genevieve Joy:

we go back and we do some checking and we do more installation of resources, right?

Genevieve Joy:

Remember the whole thing is about a search for resources.

Genevieve Joy:

So let me give them to you now.

Genevieve Joy:

And it's about finding the new meaning here.

Genevieve Joy:

And again, it's very, very simple.

Genevieve Joy:

You can do the whole thing from like, oh my gosh, I realized

Genevieve Joy:

I just found a pattern.

Genevieve Joy:

Let me go get the process to.

Genevieve Joy:

Did the discovery work.

Genevieve Joy:

I did the self-healing work and I've done the installation of resources, whole

Genevieve Joy:

thing, ba bing, ba boom, 30 minutes max.

Genevieve Joy:

That's all you need.

Genevieve Joy:

Now you have to go do the work of making new choices.

Genevieve Joy:

It's not over then.

Genevieve Joy:

Right?

Genevieve Joy:

You are required to make radically different choices, but

Genevieve Joy:

then the healing phase is over.

Genevieve Joy:

And the brave work, you know, of taking action in new ways continues.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

That's exciting.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

, to say the least.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

So.

Jeannie Oliver:

, we're getting into that sort of deeper trans state.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

maybe after doing this emotional barf Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

That you talked about.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

And then, you know, when that person is in that state, that deeper trans

Jeannie Oliver:

state, I mean, how unconscious are they?

Jeannie Oliver:

Like what are you seeing on the screen?

Jeannie Oliver:

Like what is the person.

Jeannie Oliver:

How aware are we?

Genevieve Joy:

gonna ask everybody's different.

Genevieve Joy:

So, okay.

Genevieve Joy:

I, I wanna say too, like that when I told you about ancient Hawaiian Huna,

Genevieve Joy:

you will go the most unconscious there.

Genevieve Joy:

I've had folks like, they look like they're asleep in front of me.

Genevieve Joy:

It's because it sends you so deeply.

Genevieve Joy:

I mean, think about it, when you are asleep, when you're actually physically

Genevieve Joy:

asleep, that's max unconsciousness, right?

Genevieve Joy:

When you are fully awake that is the max consciousness level for you, right?

Genevieve Joy:

During our waking hours.

Genevieve Joy:

so from the client's perspective, You can go as deep as you want to into trance.

Genevieve Joy:

Again, it is up to you.

Genevieve Joy:

Some people look like they're asleep, , and some people look

Genevieve Joy:

like they're fairly coherent.

Genevieve Joy:

With the quantum healing process that I teach inside my.

Genevieve Joy:

Selfie course Warrior Woman University, you're actually going to be listening

Genevieve Joy:

to a series of, like, remember those?

Genevieve Joy:

Choose your own adventure books that we had when we were kids, right?

Genevieve Joy:

So I set the audios up that way so that you're gonna get as close

Genevieve Joy:

to a one-on-one experience as you would get, but it's self-directed.

Genevieve Joy:

So you're gonna be listening to that.

Genevieve Joy:

So you're gonna be, if you've ever meditated before, it's gonna look and

Genevieve Joy:

feel like that Most people close their.

Genevieve Joy:

, some people don't.

Genevieve Joy:

But you're gonna be guided the whole way through.

Genevieve Joy:

When we're in a one-to-one session, I always do those over Zoom.

Genevieve Joy:

I'm going to use a more powerful spiritual healing tool.

Genevieve Joy:

And that's because I mean, first of all, it just cuts through a hundred

Genevieve Joy:

percent of that conscious resistance.

Genevieve Joy:

It's just not there with Huna.

Genevieve Joy:

And I don't teach that yet to my students because in order to receive

Genevieve Joy:

that, you have to go through a very intense spiritual initiation process.

Genevieve Joy:

Most people are not ready for that just yet.

Genevieve Joy:

Later I will be teaching it in kind of like a level two.

Genevieve Joy:

But anyway, with my one-to-one clients, that's what I use and yep.

Genevieve Joy:

People do, they'll, they look like they're partly asleep.

Genevieve Joy:

But I alway there are cues I use in the process that I do.

Genevieve Joy:

If this is happening, nod your head, and even if you look like you're

Genevieve Joy:

out, you're gonna nod your head.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

So it, it just, it depends on the person and, and how deep they wanna go.

Genevieve Joy:

But everybody comes back up.

Genevieve Joy:

You are doing this inside yourself.

Genevieve Joy:

I'm not doing anything to you.

Genevieve Joy:

I'm guiding you through a process with the Una healing, I'm actually

Genevieve Joy:

using my breath and my hands to create and blow symbols that I blow to you.

Genevieve Joy:

So it's a much more high level.

Genevieve Joy:

There's none consciousness happening on your end and that is coming in

Genevieve Joy:

and doing work for you, which is.

Genevieve Joy:

, there's just no conscious resistance at all.

Genevieve Joy:

And that creates change on the level of identity.

Genevieve Joy:

It changes who you are, how you see yourself, what's

Genevieve Joy:

important to you, your values.

Genevieve Joy:

That is, values are what's most important to you.

Genevieve Joy:

Yep.

Genevieve Joy:

At your deepest level of your unconscious.

Genevieve Joy:

And it has the ability to change though.

Genevieve Joy:

So that's why all in, in one session, we can just get massive,

Genevieve Joy:

massive transformations with one quick little process.

Genevieve Joy:

That's

Jeannie Oliver:

amazing.

Jeannie Oliver:

I'm excited to try this with you.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah,

Jeannie Oliver:

. Genevieve Joy: We'll circle back

Jeannie Oliver:

after I've done this with you.

Jeannie Oliver:

Totally.

Jeannie Oliver:

So speaking a little bit to, you know, so many

Jeannie Oliver:

people and myself too, like I've done a lot of healing work.

Jeannie Oliver:

I feel like I'm in a healthy place as far as my relationship

Jeannie Oliver:

with my food and my body.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

It was a long road getting here.

Jeannie Oliver:

Is it?

Jeannie Oliver:

. Definitely not.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

But you know, so many people that I work with are really still struggling

Jeannie Oliver:

with self-hatred, body hatred.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

Emotional eating.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

Food addiction, sometimes, you know, alcohol addiction.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Usually it's a sugar addiction in, in one form or another.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

And so when we're talking about something like that, like if someone decides to

Jeannie Oliver:

do this type of work with you mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

, what could they.

Jeannie Oliver:

Expect to shift, like just speaking to that more specifically.

Genevieve Joy:

Okay.

Genevieve Joy:

So the clients that I love working with the most and who tend to get

Genevieve Joy:

the best results are those who no longer care about why they ended

Genevieve Joy:

up in the position they're in.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm.

Genevieve Joy:

They don't care about who did what to them and what their damage.

Genevieve Joy:

, all they care about is putting an end to their personal pain and

Genevieve Joy:

suffering as fast as possible.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

And they're committed to being brave.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

This is not a do it to me kind of thing.

Genevieve Joy:

You've gotta participate here, right?

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Even with Huna, and you, I mean, that's the, just the fact you've gotta make

Genevieve Joy:

choices, you know, that are new and, and stop making those choices that you.

Genevieve Joy:

You gotta make the choices that you avoided making in the past.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

. Okay?

Genevieve Joy:

So that you can permanently move your life in a new direction.

Genevieve Joy:

I mean, look, you can think about it like this.

Genevieve Joy:

If you are stuck inside a deeply problematic pattern that keeps

Genevieve Joy:

playing out over and over and over again in your life, it kind of

Genevieve Joy:

feels like your life is on fire.

Genevieve Joy:

. Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

. Well, if your real home, the place where you live, your life was on

Genevieve Joy:

fire, you would call 9 1 1 and the fire department would respond.

Genevieve Joy:

Now, the fire department is not gonna roll up in front of your blazing

Genevieve Joy:

inferno and just stare at it while they have a deep discussion about

Genevieve Joy:

who I have started this fire, and how are we gonna get that person to stop?

Genevieve Joy:

They know that's not their job.

Genevieve Joy:

That's the police's job stuff.

Genevieve Joy:

Fire, right?

Genevieve Joy:

The firefighter's job is to protect your ability to live a safe and

Genevieve Joy:

peaceful life by putting out this fire as fast as possible.

Genevieve Joy:

You know, the, the issues with putting out fires in your life is

Genevieve Joy:

that most people really want the police and not the fire department.

Genevieve Joy:

They're looking for somebody to blame , right?

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah, that's so true.

Genevieve Joy:

Yes.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

That just ain't gonna work.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

. So, I mean, to just be really literal, right?

Genevieve Joy:

The women who get the best results from working with me have realized that they

Genevieve Joy:

have to stop blaming everyone, including themselves for their circumstances.

Genevieve Joy:

That's true.

Genevieve Joy:

It doesn't matter why you got here.

Genevieve Joy:

. Right?

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

And that's what enables them to do healing work that really

Genevieve Joy:

produces lasting powerful results.

Genevieve Joy:

So if you're gonna insist on blaming anybody for any reason, you're gonna

Genevieve Joy:

limit your ability to heal now.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

, once the fire is out, yes, we do need to look at the choices you am you made, or

Genevieve Joy:

avoided making that contributed to the creation of that problematic pattern.

Genevieve Joy:

That's what's really gonna end this thing.

Genevieve Joy:

Of course if you make the same old choices, no, you will not be

Genevieve Joy:

able to recreate the exact same pattern in the exact same way the

Genevieve Joy:

neurology that created is gone.

Genevieve Joy:

But you will play it out in a new way, and I promise you that's more heartbreaking.

Genevieve Joy:

It is now.

Genevieve Joy:

This is not about exercising your willpower.

Genevieve Joy:

Right?

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

I, I think you would agree it's not gonna produce sustainable results.

Genevieve Joy:

It's just not.

Genevieve Joy:

Cuz you can't consciously override your unconscious programming.

Genevieve Joy:

What we do instead is recognize that you made those choices again because they

Genevieve Joy:

gave you access to an emotional resource.

Genevieve Joy:

So there's no need to blame.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

. Okay.

Genevieve Joy:

And we can find out what that resource.

Genevieve Joy:

And neutralize it so that you have access to it.

Genevieve Joy:

Now, you don't feel compelled to do all these unproductive things to

Genevieve Joy:

try to get it, and you just Right.

Genevieve Joy:

You're free to do radically different things that will Yep.

Genevieve Joy:

You're gonna have to feel bright.

Genevieve Joy:

It's, it's a little bit like, you know, you're gonna have

Genevieve Joy:

to do some Wonder Woman moves.

Genevieve Joy:

Yes, you are.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

That leads you in a brand new direction that you can stay in permanently.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

I believe that, I mean, you may have heard it in there, there is like an

Genevieve Joy:

addiction compulsion component to every kind of problematic pattern.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

. So let's recognize that, you know, and bring that into our healing.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

Because even if we don't like it, we become adapted to living in dysfunctional

Genevieve Joy:

ways, and that that's what allows that problematic pattern to continue.

Genevieve Joy:

And in order to break it for good, we need to break our addiction to being

Genevieve Joy:

the version of ourselves who tolerat.

Genevieve Joy:

So that we can become someone new.

Genevieve Joy:

This is about healing and letting go of your old identity, and you have to

Genevieve Joy:

be willing to let that old identity and everything that came with it die away.

Genevieve Joy:

The degree to which you are willing to let your old identity die

Genevieve Joy:

is the degree to which that you will be able to live in new ways.

Genevieve Joy:

That's the way it works.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

And something that you said when we were just chatting before we started

Jeannie Oliver:

recording, I thought was really profound.

Jeannie Oliver:

And you said, you know, it's one thing to remove that compulsion or to, take

Jeannie Oliver:

the, power away from the negative thing.

Jeannie Oliver:

It's, it's yet another thing to start taking action.

Jeannie Oliver:

in the opposite direction.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

And start moving forward with what you need to do.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

Versus just focusing on what you need to not do.

Jeannie Oliver:

Right.

Jeannie Oliver:

And so, I have a similar thing that I always try to reiterate over and over

Jeannie Oliver:

my clients that let's say, dessert after dinner is like your Achilles heel, and you

Jeannie Oliver:

always want something sweet after eating dinner, and you just can't say no to it.

Jeannie Oliver:

It's so hard.

Jeannie Oliver:

It's like, well, you can't just.

Jeannie Oliver:

, remove the sweet after dinner and expect to not have this like gaping hole there.

Jeannie Oliver:

You know, you need to fill it with something.

Jeannie Oliver:

And like you said, that res, what is filling that emotional need?

Jeannie Oliver:

What resource can you put in place there that takes the place that fills that void?

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

. So I heard a really interesting.

Jeannie Oliver:

Podcast the other day where the gal was talking about she's decided to

Jeannie Oliver:

go alcohol free for a whole year.

Jeannie Oliver:

And initially she was only gonna do one month and then she kind of was

Jeannie Oliver:

like, oh, maybe I'll do 90 days, and then it extended to three months, and

Jeannie Oliver:

then she eventually like almost hit the six month mark and she's like, well,

Jeannie Oliver:

why not just keep going with this?

Jeannie Oliver:

But one of the really cool things that enabled her to stay on this path was the

Jeannie Oliver:

fact that she, you know, . Everyone's different with whatever reasons that

Jeannie Oliver:

they have, but for her, it wasn't so much about having the drink or

Jeannie Oliver:

the ritual of making the drink.

Jeannie Oliver:

She and her husband are wine lovers.

Jeannie Oliver:

They enjoy really good wine.

Jeannie Oliver:

It was about kind of the taste, but more so about the connection and

Jeannie Oliver:

the time of like just connecting with her husband over this.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Unwinding.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Enjoying that time together.

Jeannie Oliver:

So she realized like that was actually the really powerful piece of this.

Jeannie Oliver:

So how can we find this connection and downtime together that's not, you

Jeannie Oliver:

know, focused on the glass of wine.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

So they started taking walks with their dogs in the evening together and you

Jeannie Oliver:

know, obviously at different times of year that can be more easy than others.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Depending on the climate you live in.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

But I thought it was really cool because by identifying like,

Jeannie Oliver:

okay, what was that emotional.

Jeannie Oliver:

whole, it was filling like what was the emotional need there?

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep, yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

What was this providing me and making peace with that.

Jeannie Oliver:

Like I always tell people, like make peace with the fact that food

Jeannie Oliver:

served you on some level up till now.

Jeannie Oliver:

. Genevieve Joy: Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

You know, and I actually found it really, really helpful.

Jeannie Oliver:

I have a whole phase in Warrior Woman University, my self-based

Jeannie Oliver:

course where we talk about pleasure and desire specifically.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

, the big concepts of pleasure and desire.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Right.

Jeannie Oliver:

We're hardwired for as humans.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yes.

Jeannie Oliver:

We need those things.

Jeannie Oliver:

Don't make 'em weird, but especially as women.

Jeannie Oliver:

There is shame around both of those things.

Jeannie Oliver:

A hundred percent.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

Right.

Jeannie Oliver:

Especially so, and, and it, it impacts every area of your life.

Jeannie Oliver:

And I'll tell you right now, the reason why you want what you want.

Jeannie Oliver:

Let's say you want a brand new Mercedes.

Jeannie Oliver:

You don't actually want the Mercedes, you want the pleasure of

Jeannie Oliver:

being driven around in a Mercedes.

Jeannie Oliver:

That's what you really want.

Jeannie Oliver:

, right?

Jeannie Oliver:

So there's pleasure associated with everything in our lives.

Jeannie Oliver:

And what we need to do is make sure that our relationship to pleasure

Jeannie Oliver:

as a general concept is healthy and beneficial for you, right?

Jeannie Oliver:

Same thing with desire.

Jeannie Oliver:

And then on the other end of this spectrum is you know, people, pleas.

Jeannie Oliver:

and self-sacrifice.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yes.

Jeannie Oliver:

That's so huge because I think especially as women too, because if

Jeannie Oliver:

you were to go ask 10 people, how do you know a woman is a good woman?

Jeannie Oliver:

I can almost guarantee you 10 outta 10 of those people are gonna say she

Jeannie Oliver:

puts everybody else before herself.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

Do you realize what's happening when you do that?

Jeannie Oliver:

Yes.

Jeannie Oliver:

. When you do that, you are saying, yeah, I'm gonna have less so you can have more.

Jeannie Oliver:

Anytime you do that, it means at the highest level you are dying to try.

Jeannie Oliver:

, is that what you wanna do?

Jeannie Oliver:

Is that really what you wanna do?

Jeannie Oliver:

And in order for you to go to sleep at night knowing that you're a good person,

Jeannie Oliver:

you have to feel dead inside in some way.

Jeannie Oliver:

No, thank you.

Jeannie Oliver:

I mean, right.

Jeannie Oliver:

But like this, this is where we go when we start getting curious about

Jeannie Oliver:

our life and really asking ourselves what's going on behind the service.

Jeannie Oliver:

Wait a minute, , is that something I really wanna do?

Jeannie Oliver:

Right.

Jeannie Oliver:

And then, I mean, look, I am, I am a mama bear at my core.

Jeannie Oliver:

Currently I am a single mom to three homeschooled kids.

Jeannie Oliver:

And being a mom and showing up for them is the most important thing to me.

Jeannie Oliver:

It, it still is, right?

Jeannie Oliver:

But I didn't know until a few years ago how to be a mom without

Jeannie Oliver:

doing major self-sacrifice, right?

Jeannie Oliver:

And in order for me to live in a new way, and that was, that self-sacrifice was

Jeannie Oliver:

what was allowing me to be abused, right?

Jeannie Oliver:

I was abusing myself and putting myself in situations where

Jeannie Oliver:

I felt like this is normal.

Jeannie Oliver:

And not only is it normal, this is good for me.

Jeannie Oliver:

This is how I be a good.

Jeannie Oliver:

Right?

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

So I had to allow my identity, what does it mean to be a good

Jeannie Oliver:

person, to be a good mother?

Jeannie Oliver:

Those definitions had to totally change, and I had to be okay with that, with

Jeannie Oliver:

those totally changing, you know?

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

In order for me to really end that pattern, I did that work, and I can

Jeannie Oliver:

tell you now, I see massive changes in my kids are not who they used to

Jeannie Oliver:

be anymore, and we have a much, much.

Jeannie Oliver:

Much more healthy relationship since I allowed myself to

Jeannie Oliver:

stop being a self sacrificer.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

I believe it.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

I believe it.

Jeannie Oliver:

And it models it for

Genevieve Joy:

them.

Genevieve Joy:

Exactly.

Genevieve Joy:

And that was the thing I really realized.

Genevieve Joy:

If I don't stop self-sacrificing, how is this pattern gonna end?

Genevieve Joy:

Well, they're gonna have to Oh, okay.

Genevieve Joy:

No, no, no, no.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah,

Jeannie Oliver:

yeah, yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

It's so powerful.

Jeannie Oliver:

It really is.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

and, you know, I've shared things that.

Jeannie Oliver:

, with my clients who are parents, but I am not a parent.

Jeannie Oliver:

So I think it's really powerful to hear a parent say like, no, this really makes

Jeannie Oliver:

a difference in your child's lives too.

Jeannie Oliver:

But again, I think at some point , we have to, whether we're parents or we're

Jeannie Oliver:

not parents, we have to detach from doing whatever it is that we should need,

Jeannie Oliver:

want to do for someone else's benefit.

Jeannie Oliver:

Right.

Jeannie Oliver:

Like at some point I think that we need to just go, what do I need?

Jeannie Oliver:

What do I want?

Jeannie Oliver:

How do I want to feel inside this earthly shell that I have?

Jeannie Oliver:

Cuz I've only got one.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

And if I don't feel like working out one day, but man, it sure makes me feel

Jeannie Oliver:

really good afterwards and my energy's better the rest of the day, like mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

when is the trade off worthwhile for us?

Jeannie Oliver:

Like, I think we have to kind of get to that point where we.

Jeannie Oliver:

This is what I need for myself.

Jeannie Oliver:

This is what I want.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

, and if it's uncomfortable for whatever reason mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

, be it because we're taking time away from, I don't know, doing something

Jeannie Oliver:

with a PTA or baking cookies or something, that the world is not

Jeannie Oliver:

gonna end if we say no to that.

Jeannie Oliver:

Right.

Jeannie Oliver:

Right.

Jeannie Oliver:

We can say yes to these.

Jeannie Oliver:

acts of self-love, self-care.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

. And the more that we can do that, we can solidify that like, this

Jeannie Oliver:

actually feels good in my body.

Jeannie Oliver:

This feels good to me.

Jeannie Oliver:

I am doing something for myself.

Jeannie Oliver:

And it builds that self trusts, builds that

Genevieve Joy:

self-love.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

And that trust muscle is, is huge.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

. And I also believe too, that it's like once you.

Genevieve Joy:

Start to really understand that you have no authority over anyone but yourself.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah, , which means like, I, I can't, there's no way for me to stop

Genevieve Joy:

anyone else from feeling any way.

Genevieve Joy:

Emotions are things that happen totally inside you.

Genevieve Joy:

They are based on your unique neurological profile.

Genevieve Joy:

that's it.

Genevieve Joy:

I can say words to you and I have no idea how that's gonna impact you.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Now look, I'm not an asshole.

Genevieve Joy:

I can make a guess, right?

Genevieve Joy:

, I don't, I don't wanna be a jerk just to be a jerk.

Genevieve Joy:

That's not how I am.

Genevieve Joy:

Right?

Genevieve Joy:

Okay.

Genevieve Joy:

So like it's both of those things, you know?

Genevieve Joy:

But also it's like, you know, I get into these situations where,

Genevieve Joy:

you know, somebody's asking me to bake the cookies, somebody's asking

Genevieve Joy:

me to, you know, do whatever.

Genevieve Joy:

and I now, in the past I would've said, oh, absolutely, I will bake the cookies.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

, absolutely.

Genevieve Joy:

I will do this thing that I definitely don't wanna do, but you

Genevieve Joy:

will feel disappointed if I don't.

Genevieve Joy:

So I'm for sure gonna say yes to that.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

Okay.

Genevieve Joy:

Now I ask myself, what do I want?

Genevieve Joy:

Because I know I'm the only person who is in charge of me.

Genevieve Joy:

So, and this is the only place that my authority lies, and I'm going to trust

Genevieve Joy:

that by doing what's right for me.

Genevieve Joy:

Yes, what's right for you will also happen even if the consequences of my actions.

Genevieve Joy:

Are you in the moment getting a little bit pissed.

Genevieve Joy:

. Yep.

Genevieve Joy:

That, that's not my business.

Genevieve Joy:

Your emotions are your business.

Genevieve Joy:

I don't have any authority over that.

Genevieve Joy:

Right?

Genevieve Joy:

Once you get in that place, you take all your power back to live

Genevieve Joy:

your life in a way that is truly vibrant, joyful, and fulfilling.

Genevieve Joy:

The more you keep doing this, people pleasing nonsense, even in the name

Genevieve Joy:

of like being a good person and giving to your kids and being a good mom.

Genevieve Joy:

It's not, it's not that way.

Genevieve Joy:

It doesn't work.

Genevieve Joy:

, you won't be happy.

Genevieve Joy:

The degree to which you do that is the degree to which you will suffer.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah, and I will say that's the most common.

Jeannie Oliver:

theme that I see repeated among people who struggle with weight and

Jeannie Oliver:

emotional eating is people pleasing.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

, it's a thing, man.

Genevieve Joy:

It's a thing.

Genevieve Joy:

it's baked into our definition of not even just a good woman.

Genevieve Joy:

I think it's more intense for women, but everybody, how do I be a good person?

Genevieve Joy:

I put everybody else before myself in.

Genevieve Joy:

. That's how I know.

Genevieve Joy:

And I, I think collectively we are very slowly, there's folks like us who

Genevieve Joy:

are awakening to that realization that that's, that's actually not how it is.

Genevieve Joy:

And we're starting to live this way.

Genevieve Joy:

And it does feel like a rebellion.

Genevieve Joy:

And it does feel like we're living outside of the Norman.

Genevieve Joy:

Yep.

Genevieve Joy:

Some people might look at that and have their own very intense feelings

Genevieve Joy:

about that, but that's not my business.

Genevieve Joy:

, that's their.

Genevieve Joy:

My job is to live in the way that serves my highest good.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yes, absolutely.

Jeannie Oliver:

And you know, I've had a really interesting, this is a little bit off

Jeannie Oliver:

track, but I think it's important to mention because I know so many women,

Jeannie Oliver:

and actually many of my clients who deal with this too ha as someone who has

Jeannie Oliver:

chosen consciously and made us, you know, concerted effort to not have children.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Man, there is so much backlash.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

And that really like.

Jeannie Oliver:

Triggers people in a huge way, and I'm, it's mostly the last, I'd

Jeannie Oliver:

say probably eight years or so, maybe seven, eight years that I

Jeannie Oliver:

have kind of been like, whatever.

Jeannie Oliver:

Like if you're, that's your deal.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Like, I'm not making any judgements on what you've chosen for yourself.

Jeannie Oliver:

This has nothing to do with you.

Jeannie Oliver:

Like Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

Whatever.

Jeannie Oliver:

If it upsets you, I'm sorry.

Jeannie Oliver:

Like, you know.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

can't help that.

Jeannie Oliver:

. Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

You're on your own.

Jeannie Oliver:

Well, but it's a really interesting thing because I, it's this really huge

Jeannie Oliver:

step and sort of statement mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

that says, I am gonna go against every societal norm, cultural, familial norm.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

And make a choice, because I know that this is the right.

Jeannie Oliver:

Thing for me.

Jeannie Oliver:

And I know it's not gonna be

Genevieve Joy:

easy sometimes too.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah, that's right.

Genevieve Joy:

That's right.

Genevieve Joy:

And you know what I had, I, I grew up knowing from the time I was a

Genevieve Joy:

very little girl, that I wanted kids.

Genevieve Joy:

This was not something that I was like, oh, you get married

Genevieve Joy:

and then you have babies.

Genevieve Joy:

And I'm like, I don't know.

Genevieve Joy:

That's what you do.

Genevieve Joy:

That's not how it was for me.

Genevieve Joy:

. Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

I will say though, that there were other things in my life where that was the case.

Genevieve Joy:

And when I got a divorce, my entire immediate circle of

Genevieve Joy:

friends evaporated instantly.

Genevieve Joy:

I, at first, I, I couldn't believe it.

Genevieve Joy:

I was absolutely shocked.

Genevieve Joy:

And then later I looked back and I was like, you know what?

Genevieve Joy:

I wonder if some of these folks were thinking that like this kind of liberation

Genevieve Joy:

was catching , and you know, if some of them weren't a little tiny bit jealous.

Genevieve Joy:

because they weren't happy in their lives.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

And the choice that I made was triggering in some way for them.

Genevieve Joy:

And again, mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

, that's not my business.

Genevieve Joy:

I just have to do what's what serves my highest good and trust

Genevieve Joy:

that that's gonna serve the highest good of everybody else too.

Jeannie Oliver:

A hundred percent.

Jeannie Oliver:

And I will throw this extra little comment about this in because I think

Jeannie Oliver:

that it's, well, it's just something I see all the time, and it ties into that.

Jeannie Oliver:

People pleasing too.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

when it comes to food choices, like there's a, I think it's Dr.

Jeannie Oliver:

Wilco had a great quote recently.

Jeannie Oliver:

He said, avoiding foods that don't agree with you.

Jeannie Oliver:

isn't being restrictive.

Jeannie Oliver:

It's self-respect.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yes.

Jeannie Oliver:

And so many people that I work with really struggle with the social aspect

Jeannie Oliver:

of, you know, I have people who are severely gluten intolerant or have.

Jeannie Oliver:

autoimmune disease, and they really need to be avoiding certain foods.

Jeannie Oliver:

They know they feel better when they do.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

But because they're in social situations, those are the times when they really

Jeannie Oliver:

struggle to draw those boundaries.

Jeannie Oliver:

Or just ask the server for what they need or stand up for themselves,

Jeannie Oliver:

because they either have friends who give 'em a hard time about it.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

, or they just are worried that they're gonna be that person, that high

Jeannie Oliver:

maintenance person, and be perceived as being, you know, picky or entitled.

Jeannie Oliver:

, trust me.

Jeannie Oliver:

Like typically if it's, if they're worried about that, they're not a picking

Genevieve Joy:

titled person No.

Genevieve Joy:

By nature or they wouldn't even cross their

Jeannie Oliver:

minds.

Jeannie Oliver:

No, but I think that it's a really good example of just saying, look,

Jeannie Oliver:

this doesn't work for my body.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

. And I am not going to eat it cuz it doesn't work for my body.

Jeannie Oliver:

And whatever else, you know, everyone else wants to do is up to

Genevieve Joy:

them.

Genevieve Joy:

Yep, yep,

Jeannie Oliver:

yep.

Jeannie Oliver:

But it's really true.

Jeannie Oliver:

Like, oftentimes I will see people.

Jeannie Oliver:

you know, as they go through this journey of making shifts with the

Jeannie Oliver:

way that they eat, incorporating movement better self-care, et cetera.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

, prioritizing, sleep, whatever, you know, eliminating alcohol or reducing it from

Jeannie Oliver:

their lives, like the social structure around that can start to get shaky.

Jeannie Oliver:

It can shift drastically.

Jeannie Oliver:

And so I think that's another aspect where this kind of work that you

Jeannie Oliver:

do could be really, really helpful because I think that, mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

, you know, as humans like.

Jeannie Oliver:

survival is being a part of like being in community.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Like there's a survival instinct there.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Right?

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

, and if we start to see our community mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

or a support

Jeannie Oliver:

system mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

potentially falling apart or losing as parts of that, or individuals,

Jeannie Oliver:

whatever that might look like mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

, that can feel really, really scary.

Jeannie Oliver:

And I, you know, it, it's not uncommon that that will be the breaking

Jeannie Oliver:

point for someone where they're like, I just can't, I can't do this.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Because on that subc.

Jeannie Oliver:

Neurological level.

Jeannie Oliver:

It's like, oh my god.

Jeannie Oliver:

like, yep, I might die

Jeannie Oliver:

. Genevieve Joy: Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

It can feel like that.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah, it absolutely can feel like that.

Jeannie Oliver:

And here's what I'll say about entitlement.

Jeannie Oliver:

I am entitled to live in a body that feels fully healthy.

Jeannie Oliver:

Amen.

Jeannie Oliver:

Thank you very much.

Jeannie Oliver:

I am entitled to that.

Jeannie Oliver:

And you are not entitled to tell me how, what's.

Jeannie Oliver:

how that looks.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Right.

Jeannie Oliver:

You're not entitled to do that.

Jeannie Oliver:

And I'll tell you this conversation too, around like eating and food and

Jeannie Oliver:

all that stuff came up in my life a lot.

Jeannie Oliver:

I, so I'm severely gluten and dairy intolerant.

Jeannie Oliver:

And I also, I just choose not to drink.

Jeannie Oliver:

I mean, I've you know, I've told you my story about I've n just

Jeannie Oliver:

never lived inside a normal body.

Jeannie Oliver:

And for me, I just like, I don't want it on purpose.

Jeannie Oliver:

Put things in my body that I know are not nourish.

Jeannie Oliver:

So I just make, that's the choice that I make no judgment for anybody else.

Jeannie Oliver:

But my ex-husband is a raging alcoholic, had a huge problem with that.

Jeannie Oliver:

And he'd wanna trap me along to his little business things, and I'd get my little

Jeannie Oliver:

glass of ice, tea or water, whatever.

Jeannie Oliver:

Nobody knows what's in there.

Jeannie Oliver:

And he would get furious with me, be like, you're making

Jeannie Oliver:

everybody else uncomfortable.

Jeannie Oliver:

And I'm like, I don't . Okay, well you're not.

Jeannie Oliver:

. It's not my deal.

Jeannie Oliver:

It's not my deal.

Jeannie Oliver:

Right.

Jeannie Oliver:

It, you know, but it made him uncomfortable because it pointed

Jeannie Oliver:

out the ways that he cannot say.

Jeannie Oliver:

. Jeannie Oliver: Exactly.

Jeannie Oliver:

And he knows that it's a shift he wants to make.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah, yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

Or needs to make, didn't wanna make mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

he needed to do and hit on that.

Jeannie Oliver:

But they don't want to, or they're not ready.

Jeannie Oliver:

And so that's often when people will start to avoid us or give us a hard time.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

. And again, we don't have control over that, that's

Genevieve Joy:

their emotional work to do.

Genevieve Joy:

Yep.

Genevieve Joy:

And like, let's just be honest.

Genevieve Joy:

. Okay.

Genevieve Joy:

When you start to do real healing work, yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Some folks in your life might have a problem with that.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

And it might mean that you are no longer an energetic match for those people.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

If you are going to insist on being an energetic match for them, you

Genevieve Joy:

might go backwards in your healing.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

That might happen for you.

Genevieve Joy:

So putting it, yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

. So again, the degree to which you are going to prioritize your own wellbeing

Genevieve Joy:

is the degree to which you will be well.

Genevieve Joy:

there it is.

Genevieve Joy:

We can be done Now.

Genevieve Joy:

I'm actually gonna

Jeannie Oliver:

write that down.

Jeannie Oliver:

, the degree to which you will prioritize your own

Genevieve Joy:

wellbeing.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

is the degree to which you will be.

Genevieve Joy:

Well, it's just true.

Genevieve Joy:

It's the

Jeannie Oliver:

degree to which you'll be Well, I'm so

Jeannie Oliver:

quoting you on that . I love it.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah, and I think the flip side of that, that's so exciting,

Jeannie Oliver:

Genevieve, that I see in you.

Jeannie Oliver:

I'm sure you've seen this with clients too, when we actually start to make

Jeannie Oliver:

those choices unapologetically.

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

, and we just say, this is what I'm doing because this is what serves me well.

Jeannie Oliver:

This is what I need.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

It actually empowers those people in our lives who are meant to be in our lives.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yes.

Jeannie Oliver:

Who are healthy, energetic matches for

Genevieve Joy:

us to build.

Genevieve Joy:

Yes.

Jeannie Oliver:

I could do that too.

Jeannie Oliver:

That's exactly.

Jeannie Oliver:

, right?

Jeannie Oliver:

Mm-hmm.

Jeannie Oliver:

. It gives them permission somehow to be like, you know, , I could do this.

Jeannie Oliver:

You can do this.

Jeannie Oliver:

We all have a right to take

Genevieve Joy:

good care of ourselves.

Genevieve Joy:

That is such a great point.

Genevieve Joy:

Because you know what if inside us, I think especially as women, we do have

Genevieve Joy:

this desire to do for others and to heal.

Genevieve Joy:

Yes.

Genevieve Joy:

Right?

Genevieve Joy:

Yes.

Genevieve Joy:

Well, here's the thing.

Genevieve Joy:

It's this both situation, okay?

Genevieve Joy:

You only have authority over yourself.

Genevieve Joy:

So when you reclaim that authority fully and you start doing things that

Genevieve Joy:

are only right for you, you allow other people to heal because you

Genevieve Joy:

become a beacon of hope for them.

Genevieve Joy:

Yes.

Genevieve Joy:

And they say to themselves, oh my God, I didn't even know that was

Genevieve Joy:

possible, but she's doing it, which means I must be able to do it too.

Genevieve Joy:

And look what happens.

Genevieve Joy:

And you allow, you create the space and the process for which

Genevieve Joy:

other people can rise up as.

Genevieve Joy:

Yes.

Genevieve Joy:

This is if you wanna actually help people, you, you do it by helping

Genevieve Joy:

yourself and like, don't be shy about it.

Genevieve Joy:

Tell people Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

And let 'em see and they'll come along with you.

Genevieve Joy:

That's how we actually do the real work.

Genevieve Joy:

It's not this other business.

Genevieve Joy:

It's not this people pleasing.

Genevieve Joy:

It's not this self-sacrifice that ain't it.

Genevieve Joy:

This is how we do it.

Genevieve Joy:

Yes.

Genevieve Joy:

You prioritize yourself and your wellbeing because it's the only

Genevieve Joy:

place where you have authority.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

. And you watch all the people come along with you.

Jeannie Oliver:

yeah, yeah.

Jeannie Oliver:

It's so powerful.

Jeannie Oliver:

So . Wow.

Jeannie Oliver:

This has been a great conversation and I learned so much and I'm super excited cuz

Jeannie Oliver:

I'm gonna schedule a session with you.

Jeannie Oliver:

I really wanna do this and Oh, I'd love to have you.

Jeannie Oliver:

Yeah, and like I say, we'll circle back and, and we'll do

Jeannie Oliver:

another episode at some point.

Jeannie Oliver:

We'll talk about it and, and You know.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Before and afters.

Genevieve Joy:

Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

, Jeannie Oliver: You briefly mentioned your

Genevieve Joy:

can find you, how they can work with you.

Genevieve Joy:

And of course, in the show notes, I'll include all of your links to

Genevieve Joy:

your website, social, et cetera.

Genevieve Joy:

But

Genevieve Joy:

. Genevieve Joy: Yeah.

Genevieve Joy:

Give us a down low.

Genevieve Joy:

Awesome.

Genevieve Joy:

So in a one-to-one container, I work with women who have one very specific

Genevieve Joy:

problematic pattern that they know this thing has gotta go now or something

Genevieve Joy:

bad is going to happen for me.

Genevieve Joy:

The container for that is called the Quantum Healing Intensive.

Genevieve Joy:

It's an eight week container where we focus on healing the source of that

Genevieve Joy:

problematic pattern, your blocks, to getting what you wanna have instead,

Genevieve Joy:

and then moving you forward by taking brave action so that you can

Genevieve Joy:

get away from who you used to be.

Genevieve Joy:

Step into that new reality of who you want to become so that we permanently

Genevieve Joy:

move your life in a new direction.

Genevieve Joy:

And then my self-paced course is called Warrior Woman University, where I teach

Genevieve Joy:

you how to do that process for yourself, how to do that investigative work and

Genevieve Joy:

really get curious about your life.

Genevieve Joy:

Phase one is learning about how you created the situation that you are in

Genevieve Joy:

now, so you can learn how to create a new one and stop creating this one, right?

Genevieve Joy:

It it's like getting the owner's manual to your own.

Genevieve Joy:

And then in phase two, we learn the ins and outs of the quantum healing process.

Genevieve Joy:

How does this thing work so that you can use it with total authority.

Genevieve Joy:

And then in that also you find those self-guided self-healing audios so

Genevieve Joy:

that you can have that experience of a one-to-one healing without

Genevieve Joy:

the actual one-to-one healing.

Genevieve Joy:

And then it's like you train yourself to do it.

Genevieve Joy:

So once you know the process, you don't need the audios anymore.

Genevieve Joy:

You can do it for yourself anytime you want.

Genevieve Joy:

And then in phase three, we are expanding your capability to receive

Genevieve Joy:

the life that you desire by doing things like neutralizing the concepts of

Genevieve Joy:

pleasure and desire and self-sacrifice.

Genevieve Joy:

Mm.

Genevieve Joy:

Right?

Genevieve Joy:

Mm-hmm.

Genevieve Joy:

so that we can actually make big changes and hold on to them over the long term.

Genevieve Joy:

And then phase four is like, okay, now we're getting down to business.

Genevieve Joy:

It's about learning how to take action and brave new ways.

Genevieve Joy:

In a way that actually gives you more energy than you put out.

Genevieve Joy:

So you're never feeling depleted.

Genevieve Joy:

We're never just using willpower.

Genevieve Joy:

That's not a thing.

Genevieve Joy:

Right.

Genevieve Joy:

And we are being brave.

Genevieve Joy:

We are doing new things right.

Genevieve Joy:

So it's all of that together.

Genevieve Joy:

And then very strategically placed throughout the course are constitutional

Genevieve Joy:

healings where we help you heal all the major negative emotions from your past.

Genevieve Joy:

We help you integrate your conscious, unconscious and higher conscious minds.

Genevieve Joy:

This is most people's, one of their favorite ones.

Genevieve Joy:

So there's no resistance anymore.

Genevieve Joy:

Those three aspects of you are all working together as one unified

Genevieve Joy:

body to help you move you forward in life and heal in, in very.

Genevieve Joy:

Profound ways.

Genevieve Joy:

I think there's six guided constitutional healings that we do throughout the course.

Genevieve Joy:

Plus that, and then there's monthly live calls.

Genevieve Joy:

So it, that is my digital baby.

Genevieve Joy:

I am so proud of it.

Genevieve Joy:

I can't even tell you.

Genevieve Joy:

. Yeah, and uh, you know, the, the healing, I'll just tell you

Genevieve Joy:

one quick story of this client.

Genevieve Joy:

One of my favorite clients, her name is Cynthia.

Genevieve Joy:

She and I worked together in the one-to-one Quantum Healing

Genevieve Joy:

Intensive a year or so ago.

Genevieve Joy:

It was over a year, I guess it was a year and a half.

Genevieve Joy:

And we were working on a specific pattern related to relationships.

Genevieve Joy:

And then I knew she had some big health challenges.

Genevieve Joy:

I know that in the past she had dealt with leukemia, but we didn't

Genevieve Joy:

really get into the depths of that.

Genevieve Joy:

And then when I created Warrior Woman University I called her up and

Genevieve Joy:

asked her if she wanted to be one of my beta testers, and she agreed.

Genevieve Joy:

Well, what she didn't tell me then, which was, it was just a year ago

Genevieve Joy:

from now, was that she had just been diagnosed with end stage.

Genevieve Joy:

And her doctors told her that she had about 30 days to live

Genevieve Joy:

and that she should call hospice.

Genevieve Joy:

But she just knew in her heart that her life wasn't over and she felt like

Genevieve Joy:

she was being given an opportunity with Warrior Woman University to do

Genevieve Joy:

this deeply healing work for herself.

Genevieve Joy:

And it was a gift that showed up, like just when she needed it.

Genevieve Joy:

So, I mean, man, she dove in head.

Genevieve Joy:

First, and she just made this big commitment to never ignore or numb

Genevieve Joy:

herself to any challenge or big emotion that came up in her life.

Genevieve Joy:

And one year later, this was about a month or two ago, she sent me

Genevieve Joy:

a Voxer message and said that she just returned back from the hospital

Genevieve Joy:

after undergoing extensive testing.

Genevieve Joy:

And even though she stopped all medical treatment, her leukemia was totally gone.

Genevieve Joy:

That's no cancer anywhere.

Genevieve Joy:

And like I'm thrilled for her.

Genevieve Joy:

Like, this is amazing.

Genevieve Joy:

Right?

Genevieve Joy:

And also I'm not, , this is work that works when you are fully

Genevieve Joy:

committed to doing the work.

Genevieve Joy:

And she was, and that's, that's why this happened for her.

Genevieve Joy:

You get to make miracles.

Genevieve Joy:

If I mean it, it's, I know it sounds like crazy and wacky, but like there

Genevieve Joy:

is a way to make magic in your life and I, and I, I found it and I did it,

Genevieve Joy:

and I can show you how to do it too.

Genevieve Joy:

It's incredible.

Genevieve Joy:

Let's do it.

Genevieve Joy:

I love

Jeannie Oliver:

it.

Jeannie Oliver:

Awesome.

Jeannie Oliver:

Well, thank you so much for joining me and sharing us with us today.

Jeannie Oliver:

And like I said, everybody, you can find Genevieve's information in the show notes.

Jeannie Oliver:

Go check out her work, check out Warrior Women University and her one-on-one

Jeannie Oliver:

work, if that rings your bill.

Jeannie Oliver:

And yeah, we'll circle back at some point and we'll talk some more in the future.

Jeannie Oliver:

And yeah, just thanks again for, for sharing all of your story and your wisdom.

Jeannie Oliver:

It's.

Genevieve Joy:

Super fun show.

Genevieve Joy:

Thank you so much for having me.

Genevieve Joy:

This has been so great.

Genevieve Joy:

I love it,

Genevieve Joy:

. Jeannie Oliver: All right.

Genevieve Joy:

Until next time.

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About the Podcast

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The Nutrition Edit

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About your host

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Jeannie Oliver

Jeannie is a Certified Nutrition Coach, NASM Personal Trainer and classically trained chef. She helps high performing women improve their overall health, optimize their energy and performance, and discover what it's like to feel good in their own skin - all while enjoying delicious food and creating sustainably healthy lifestyles.